Tuesday 31 July 2007

Too old to laugh

I watch you get ready for work,
the perfect makeup, the right clothes,
not a hair out of place.
Still you talk,
and I, as usual listen-
with only one ear.
"Stop taking life so casually,
there's a time to grow up,"
you say.
Should start thinking of what
I want to do with my life.
Start working for that promotion,
saving for a car,
begin to look out for a wedding ring.
And when you see my placid expression,
you exasperatedly say, that I've lost much,
before you walk out the door.
And perhaps you're right,
I do need to grow up,
I might have even lost much.
I can't help but think though,
that you've lost more.
The things we used to love,
don't mean much to you anymore.
You'd rather go to a cafe,
than just enjoy a picnic
on a Sunday afternoon,
you'd rather go to the cinema
than stay in one saturday
and revel in the antics of a
Tom and Jerry cartoon,
its important for you to
look sophisticated, smart and sassy
than get dirty with the rest of us
as we wrestle across the sand
on a beach for a volleyball.
You grew up too fast my dear,
and you grew too old to laugh.

Wednesday 25 July 2007

Because I share it with You.

This night's colder than any other,
not starry bright either.
But inside I bubble with laughter,
and smile in delight.
This night is more beautiful
than any other
because I share it with you.

Friday 20 July 2007

Once upon a star.(An Angel's journal)

This story is really a draft but I hope you like it anyway.

It was one of those days, when there is a certain calm, the mind is at peace and you long just to dream. Some of the angels decided to play a game of football so I used this chance to slip away and take a walk. Heaven is always beautiful but on a day like this, its allure grows in leaps and bounds. It was a day when the butterflies all came out to play and they looked like petals floating in the breeze.

Even Suku, one of the youngest chimps wasn't up to his usual antics. He seemed to prefer his mother's back to terrorising the birds. I simply don't know how he does it. He loves to climb up a tree and scare the living daylights out of any bird. How on earth he manages to sneak up on a bird is absolutely beyond me but he does make us laugh.

Merry thoughts were going through my mind as i made my way to the fruit trees. I heard a sound and stopped. I could hear muffled sobbing as if the little creature didn't want anyone to hear but the woeful sound tore at my heart. I looked avidly for the sound until I caught sight of the lone creature. Why, it was a star.

I began to make my way to it when I felt a presence. It brought along with it, an aura, of peace and I knew it was my Lord. The star stopped weeping and quickly dried its tears. The master sat beside it. He spoke. I don't believe you've heard the master speak before but oh how wonderful that voice is. Its not that its sounds like anyone who should be getting a Grammy every year, it just makes you happy. You feel loved. I stood a far, a little guilty for eavesdropping but I longed to hear.

"What's wrong little one? Why are you so low?"

"Me, I'm so happy..." One look at the Master's face and he stopped lying.

"Lord, you already know, why should I tell you?"

"Because I love to listen to you."

"You do?" the little creature asked incredulously.

"Of course I do. Even the little snores you make when you're asleep. The sounds you make when you're pretending to be a train and cry 'choo choo' which drives the other stars crazy."
At that the little one chuckled, "It does drive them crazy." He grew quiet, then asked.

"Do you really love to listen to me? Do you really love me? Does it bother you that I can't shine as bright as the other stars do? We're so many. Billions of stars in just one of billions of galaxies. Do you even know I exist? I'm so little and my light is so dim." This outburst seemed to have drained all the energy in the little chapped and he breathed heavily as he kept his tear stained face on Jesus.

"Oh, come here," and He drew the little chap onto His lap.

"I knew you before you were made. I watched as you were formed. And I know there are so many creatures created, but I love you like there is no one else. Sure, you're not the brightest star, but you don't have to be, you're wonderful just the way you are. Remember the night you got measles and you had to miss your cousin's birthday party?"

"Yes," he nodded as his memory was jogged.

"and you prayed to God because you didn't want to be alone?"

"Yes, then a puppy just came out of nowhere and..." recognition dawned and he smiled, "you sent the puppy."

"Actually, it was an angel, who wasn't willing to be a puppy even on assignment, but he had so much fun he came back the next day."

I began to smile smugly. We'd had so much fun that night, I remember. We played catch and he loved it when I tickled him with my nose even if it was a doggy nose.

"In fact, that little angel isn't far off."

My heart began to race. This wasn't the way things were supposed to turn out.

"You can come out of hiding now."

I came out, not without some embarrassment.

"Rufus!" An excited star called out and ran to me. That was his puppy's name. I lifted him up high.
Jesus stood up and asked, "Do you doubt I love you now?"

The little guy shook his head and just as Jesus turned, the little star called out, "I love you too, Jesus."

Wednesday 18 July 2007

8 Random Facts

Was tagged by Prettylyf. Had done something similar earlier but I'll try to make this different.

The Rules are:-
We have to post these rules before we give you the facts.

Players start with eight random facts/habits about themselves.

People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.

At the end of your blog post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.

Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

  • Unless I'm dining with someone, I can't eat without having something to read. Even if its the ingredients on a cereal box. I just have to read something.


  • I sometimes count words in sentences, especially if I like the way it sounds. Don't ask me why, I don't know either.


  • Don't like shopping, much to my mom's chagrin.


  • Don't like talking much either. Sometimes I just need to share silence with someone.


  • I love to let go sometimes. Let the little child in me get out. Unfortunately, its only a certain kind of people who can set it free. So I love them for that.


  • I love it when someone hugs me just because. (not those stereotype hugs you get every time you meet someone)


  • Love it when I find a really nice book.(You know how hard it is to come across one)


  • I love the laughter of a child. It doesn't have the restraints of worry or care. Its a beautiful sound.

Okay, done my lot so I'm tagging: Lulu, 27th Comrade, Sparkle, jaybabe, pea, mafudian, be silent, rae.

Monday 16 July 2007

Have Your way

Oh heart of mine,
here we are again,
and I can't for the
life of me,
guess how we
found ourselves here.
All, I know is this soul
of mine is grieving,
and crouched inside,
dear heart, you lie weeping.
And I,
am just so tired.
trying to hold
on to my sanity,
Fighting for some peace.
Then He tells me
to just rest,
to simply let go.
Even as I desire
that tranquility
I quiver with fear.
If I stop fighting,
does it show weakness?
Gently you remind me that
its in my weakness
that You are strong,
that its okay to cry,
that faith inYou
is not about
pretending that
everything is fine.
And so I do.
I just let go,
give You everything.
Have Your way.

Tuesday 10 July 2007

You were right

That was always my excuse.
I'd rather crawl under a duvet
and have a date with a novel.
Oh they're beautiful.
They take you away,
to far away places.

But yesterday,
I found you were right.
Books, wonderful creations
though they are,
-cannot love.

Friday 6 July 2007

The Seasons Of My Soul by: Helen Steiner Rice

Why am I cast down
And despondently sad
When I long to be happy
And joyous and glad?

Why is my heart heavy
With unfathomable weight
As I try to escape
This soul-saddened state?

I ask myself often ...
"What makes life this way,
Why is the song silenced
In the heart that was gay?"

And then, with God's help
It all becomes clear,
The "Soul" has its "Seasons"
Just the same as the year.

I, too, must pass through
Life's autumn of dying,
A desolate period
Of heart-hurt and crying.

Followed by winter
In whose frostbitten hand
My heart is as frozen
As the snow-covered land.

Yes, man too must pass
Through the seasons God sends,
Content in the knowledge
That everything ends.

And, Oh! What a blessing
To know there are reasons
And to find that our soul
Must, too, have it's seasons.

"Bounteous Seasons"
And "Barren Ones," too.
Times for rejoicing
And times to be blue.

But meeting these seasons
Of dark desolation
With strength that
is born Of anticipation

That comes from knowing
That "autumn-time sadness"
Will surely be followed by a
"Springtime of Gladness."

Wednesday 4 July 2007

Not Afraid

There was a time,
when I worried about
what people thought of me.
Would I be too weird,
if I spoke so much about You?
Would they stare,
if I raised my hands to Worship You?
If I closed my eyes
to say a prayer before I ate in a diner,
would I draw so much attention?
Would I be isolated if I told people
that my idea of a high
was being drunk in the Spirit.
But, I'm not afraid
to love YOU any more.

Lived this life and found,
there's no rest outside You.
If estrangement is the cost
of loving you,
It will only isolate me from,
anything that would keep me
away from you.
You're worth so much more,
than anything than I could give
yet You still love me,
so today I decide,
that I'll never again,
be afraid to love You.

Monday 2 July 2007

Cocktail

A thousand times,
I ask myself why I love you,
a thousand times,
I respond, "I don't know".
A thousand times,
I've told my heart, "let go",
a thousand times,
My heart's said "no".
And though a thousand times,
you make me cry,
One moment with you,
makes me smile.
And I suppose life's a cocktail;
a cocktail of laughter and tears
Perhaps its fate that
I have you in my wineglass.